I recently concluded that I am a poor blogger. Somehow, I have always had the notion in my head that each blog has to be exciting, poignant, and profound. This might explain the scarcity of my blogs. Clearly, not every day is so enlightening, but that is no reason to not talk about it. After all, this is my life. Yes, often boring and humdrum, but there are always plenty of things to share, seeing as each day presents new challenges and lessons. Therefore, I will try and blog more frequently.
The most pressing news is a recent discovery that I am actually starting to enjoy and appreciate the girls. Sounds bad, right? Over 3 months into it, and I am just now beginning to fancy these little creatures. Initially (and until a few weeks ago, to be honest), it was all I could manage to tolerate the girls. I went through a cycle each week.
At the beginning of the week, I was a bit refreshed from the weekend, and only mildly dreaded drudging up the muddy forest floor to retrieve them. By mid week, my patience would be bordering nonexistent, and I am sure they could sense the disdain and scorn emanating from my forced smile. I patrolled the clock, anxiously awaiting the parents return at 5 P.M. I would play and entertain them minimally, and because I had such a disliking of them, I found ways to evade having to interact with them. I was really becoming an atrocious and insensitive au pair.
In my own defense, they weren't pleasant to deal with. The oldest mouthed off and possessed the attitude of a 32-year-old woman from New Jersey, minus the long, press-on nails, tight polyester outfits, and sharp, nasal accent. Her disrespectful often spiteful attitude made me forget she was only a 6-year-old Czech girl. In the rarest of moments, when every single aspect was to her liking, she could be surprisingly sweet and thoughtful.
The younger one as I mentioned in the past has a more loving and affectionate nature. When she is sleepy she finds the nearest head of hair stroking it and twirling it between her fingers while sucking her thumb. Yet, she is dramatic and stubborn. I could tolerate her more mainly because she hasn't acquired the vocabulary to verbally abuse me, except to say "You're not my mom!" to which I always replied, "Thank God!" Instead, she acts out in other ways, throwing things, hitting, crying, not obeying in the least. Obedience and discipline are two words I believe the children have never heard uttered in Czech, English or any other tongue, until a few weeks ago.
About two weeks prior, I was questioning how on earth I was going to survive until summer, which is when I plan to leave. My brilliant mother suggested I develop some sort of reward system, since discipline didn't seem to be much of an option. I had tossed this idea around before she even mentioned, but dismissed it because I thought the girls wouldn't care due to the fact they get most things they want regardless.
Despite my trepidation, two weeks ago, I made a chart with 5 words: Obedient, Respectful, Helpful, Kind, and Politeness. According to my friend who teaches at the school, Fina is familiar with this sort of system because they do it in school. I explained to Fina that she had to get 5 stars to get a "prize". I promptly had to define that is was a "prize" and not a "present". I told her she had to earn the prize, and I would only warn her a few times before I took one of her stars away for the day if she was misbehaving. She seemed excited about it. I sense she is a goal-oriented person, and having something tangible, not just praise, suits her personality better. I have been told she is an excellent student and very bright for her age.
I had to ask for Fina's help to translate the new concept to Zdeni. With arms crossed over my chest in an authoritative stance, I narrowed my eyes and had a slight grin, mainly because I had a 6-year-old translating. for me As Fina explained, Zdenicka's eyes darted from Fina to myself, back and forth, and I would give her a nod as if I agreed with everything Fina was describing, not that I had any clue what she was actually saying. I knew that she probably didn't understand fully, but she would learn quickly by example.
The wildest thing is it actually worked! The girls behavior transformed nearly overnight. Granted, I think neither is absorbing the concept of why they should be respectful, kind, polite, helpful, and obedient other than the fact that some trinket or goodie awaits them after dinner. So far, I haven't taken any stars away and every night they have earned their prize.
Tonight, ironically, (I started this blog in the afternoon) I gave Fina her prize, which was a package of Hairbo gummie candies. Instantly upon seeing the candy, she became deflated, saying "These again!?" through gritted teeth, even though I had never given them before. Sulking, she turned and headed for the stairs not even taking the prize. I was offended and angry, but mostly terrified that already the system was failing. My brain was screaming "Error! Error! Error!" I coaxed her to come back to me and I squatted down and looked her in the eyes. (Some tip I remembered from SuperNanny how kids respond better if you go down to their level.) I told her it made me sad she didn't like the prize and explained that she couldn't have big prizes every time. I told her I would try and get something different, not candy. Zdenicka, on the other hand, started jumping up and down with excitement, which is typical, she is easy to please.
Tomorrow, there will be a revision of the system and I will definitely be talking to Fina again. I must explain to her if she is going to act like that then we will stop the prize system altogether! (oh god, please no no no!) I am hoping she will understand and reform her ways quickly. Maybe 'grateful' will be added to the chart as well?
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