Future's Looking Thin...

Today is day 7! Yes, I've made it one whole week! I fell off the wagon today a bit, splurging on "Melba Toast"... of all things, I know, I know. I am allowed two pieces per day.  Has anyone ever seen Melba Toast?  I am debating on cutting them out entirely.  Why is it that bland, easy to eat foods are such a weakness for me? Why don't I splurge on asparagus or Swiss chard? I'm not alarmed that I slipped today.  It could have been worse. It could have the raspberry-ice cream sitting in the freezer...  It could have been a Chick-Fil-A chicken deluxe chicken sandwich ;-) But regardless, calories are calories.


Last time, in the first few months of trying to lose, everyone was telling me how much weight I had lost, but I couldn't see it in the mirror yet.  My clothes became baggier and baggier, and yet, I still couldn't see it.  Isn't that funny?  Similarly, when I put on I can't really "see" just how much I've gained.  Perception is such a challenging aspect of the journey. 


This morning I was down 14 lbs, since I started. (We'll see tomorrow AM if that is still true with the Melba Toast fiasco). Fourteen pounds for someone my size, is a drop in the bucket, not to discredit my efforts. It's a great start, but I can't help but wonder at how many pounds will I see some results? It's so exciting to think about! 


I decided today instead of focusing on how I feel, and how challenging this journey is, that I would focus on all the amazing things I'm looking forward to as a thinner, healthier me:


-SHOPPING! Not to be too cliche, but I can't wait until I can shop for clothes and actually enjoy the way the clothes lay on my body. I can't wait to see a number on the tag of my jeans that doesn't make me feel ashamed and humiliated. I can't wait to try on clothes with my mom and not fight ;-)


-CONFIDENCE- I can't wait to feel more confident. To walk into a place fully confident, not thinking people are judging me on how horrible or fat I look, but know who I am , what I have to offer, and how fabulous I am and not giving too much thought to other people's criticisms. 


-EXERCISE- I can't wait to be able to run again! I had gained the endurance to run 5 miles or more without stopping.  It was an incredible feeling of accomplishment! I couldn't even do that in high school. It was a way to relieve stress and clear my mind.  I can't wait to be fit again, and have some endurance and strength.


-THIGHAGE- I can't wait for my thighs to touch less.  This might sound crazy for those of you who have never been overweight, or have very thin legs. Some people's thighs might not even be aware that it has a mate just across the way, but my thighs have rarely been apart, but they are getting very fed up with each other, and I think it's time they give each other some space.


-COMFORT- Again, some of you might not know what it's like to be overweight, and I commend you for this.  Some of you might have been pregnant though, and can relate to the feeling of being trapped in this large, awkward form that inhibits you at times from doing the most simple of tasks.  It's embarrassing but more over, it's frustrating!! To struggle to do elementary, daily duties is absolutely not a way to live!


-HEALTH- I want to live a healthy life.  I do not want to spend hundreds of thousands of dollars in avoidable medical bills. I want to have energy and great joints. I want to be strong! 


-AIRPLANE SEATS- I haven't flown in a long while, but I most definitely don't want to be one of those people who need a seat belt extender! I do recall, that the last time I flew in the autumn, I was at the end of the belt.  I don't want to be one of those people who enter the plane and hit every other passenger with my hips as I walk down the aisle, and every seated passenger is praying I'm not going to sit next to them and overflow into their seat overcrowding them for the duration of the flight. 


-LEATHER JACKET- I have this leather jacket I bought in Spain, and desperately want to fit in again.  In fact, I want to be able to fit in all my old clothes again.. Then, get even thinner. 


These are just a few of the many positive, life-changing results I'm expecting!!